When I was 17 years old I went to St Martin with dad and my stepmom, Debbie. Little did I know it at the time, but parts of that trip would define me for the rest of my life. We stayed in this incredible bungalow twenty feet off of the beach at this isolated resort called La Samanna on the French side of the island. We had rented this crappy little jeep that would take us up and down the deep and narrow mountain roads of St Martin. If you’ve ever met my father then you know he isn’t really a “tourist”, he’s a traveler. I think to some degree I’ve adopted this mentality. When he goes on a vacation he refuses to do touristy shit but instead chooses to enjoy what anyone from that place would enjoy. I think a trip to London and the English countryside at Christmas a year before to see Oxford, the Crown Jewels and many other sites might have been better titled, “Best Pubs of London”. When I was a little kid, he went alone on medical mission trips living on a sailboat in Honduras and hiked the Canadian Rockies by himself. But that is what I love about my father. He does what he loves and he doesn’t make excuses. He is truly unafraid. Unfortunately, for him, he had to compromise in St Martin for me and Debbie.
As much as I’m excited for Christmas, near blizzard weather conditions and snow days, the truth is that I’m already craving laying by the beach in Miami, getting burnt by the pool and eating raw fruit while walking around barefoot. Earlier this week temperatures in Indianapolis were in the upper 70’s, but tonight they’ve dropped into the low 40’s, almost snow weather. Alex and I have been plotting and planning all week about trips we want to take next year and all of them are in warm places. I found myself driving around tonight listening to Christmas music and I thought, “This is insane!” I hadn’t posted a ‘Song of the Day’ in over a week so I started researching what song was at the top of the Billboard charts on this day when I was in high school. As soon as I found out I started laughing hilariously, thinking about how much I drove my friends crazy with this ridiculous song. ALL, and I mean all of you will know this song, trust me. In high school I liked listening to punk music, the likes of The Smiths, The Cure, New Order, Siouxie and the Banshees, The Psychedelic Furs and many more. This specific song just didn’t fit into my repertoire, but I listened to it on repeat nonetheless. I think it reminded me of summer and those wonderful, lazy days in the sun. Maybe it can still serve that purpose! To all of my old friends, I apologize. I had no idea what I was doing at the time. Enjoy and feel the sun!
Halloween is my absolute favorite holiday. I’m not sure if its the smell of chili on the stove and corn muffins in the oven or the sound of the rustle of the leaves as the wind carries them up the side of our house, but Halloween has both a comforting and spooky feeling, all at the same time. Throughout the weeks before Halloween, my television is consumed with scary movies or episodes of Roseanne’s tribute to the most wonderful holiday of the year. While driving in my car, I either listen to scary audio books or stories told on the radio, both reminding me of the earliest Halloween tale I ever heard…the scariest Halloween story that ever’d was!
I was raised on folk music. My earliest memories are filled with the speakers of my mother’s record player spinning tunes from Joan Baez, Judy Collins, Bob Dylan, Arlo Guthrie, Pete Seeger and especially Joni Mitchell. My mother always kept her records in their plastic wrap, perfectly alphabetized Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, Cat Stevens, Gordon Lightfoot, and Simon and Garfunkel. Their lyrics were my lullabies and their stories were my stories as I grew up, contemplating adult ideas and feelings long before I should have been concerned. Much of this music is lost today. Once in awhile I’ll mention a favorite song of one of these artists and people look at me as if they have no idea what I’m talking about. Even at 43 I still relate to the words of Janis Ian’s At Seventeen, yet remind myself of a newer truth, that It isn’t all it seems…at forty-three…
In the last few months I’ve been thinking a lot about getting back to my roots. I’ve wanted to kind of rekindle that old bohemian soul from my youth and just live out loud as much as possible. Part of this was wanting to make this blog my own personal blog instead of a centerpiece for business, which obviously it will continue to be. That being said, in the next few months as well as the year to come, I hope to post more personal blogs, fun blogs and things that turn me on, not necessarily pieces for reader views. Part of that is my Song of the Day, which will probably end up being a Song of Every Other Day or Every Third Day because I’m not very good with consistency. I’ve always wanted to be a DJ…or a VJ(Downtown Julie Brown was my idol!). This section will give me that outlet. I hope you’ll stop by daily and check out whatever song I’m grooving on or a song that I feel is perfect for that particular day. And stay around for more fun posts and videos on my YouTube channel! I hope you enjoy today’s pick! I think it’s perfect.
Tonight I was cleaning out my e-mail and noticed that my Old Messages folder was filled with e-mails from businesses like The Coffee Shop Billionaire, Wealthy Affiliate and programs like iTunes Affiliate and Amazon Affiliate, as well as many others. I started to delete these messages then thought maybe I should check out these amazing programs. I mean, who wouldn’t like sitting in a coffee shop and running a multi-million dollar online business? I went back through my messages and deleted the rest of the crap I didn’t need and came back to these “invitations”. (I should warn you before proceeding…First, this is not a review and second, I will probably use lots of quotation marks, indicating sarcasm.) I slowly started reading them, one by one, and really giving them attention in a way I hadn’t before.
Earlier today I watched a video by YouTube star Davey Wavey titled “I’m In An Open Relationship…”. The video is Davey’s explanation of his reasoning for being in an open relationship stating, “To me it’s like going to Disneyland and being like ’Alright, I’m just going to ride this one ride over and over and over again.’ And like yeah, of course you could totally do that but why would you do that to yourself? There’s all these other really cool rides you could ride on.” He further questions monogamy by asking ““Why? Why would you do that to yourself?” It made me start wondering; why are there so many posts, videos and blogs defending open relationships but very few defending monogamy? Why are gay activists, like Dan Savage, leading the forefront of this movement by terming phrases like “monogamish”, stating that by nature, we are not meant to have only one partner? Let me put this bluntly; to me, it seems like a huge justification to fuck whoever you want to fuck. It might be better to ask why we aren’t striving for more committed relationships? Intimacy is a vital part of every relationship, and that does not just begin and end in the bedroom. Who really wants to have an honest conversation about this topic? To me, there is an answer for the need to be in an open relationship; be single.